yo I wanna see you, bring that beard of yours
Just checked, might have creepy crawlies. What does chlamydia feel like? Not near wireless to consult webMD.
people from other dorms came to marvel at the dump i took. i had a bio major take a picture.
That shit is worth it...they got medicine for that now a days
is it customary for a bride to wear white even if she's a whore? i feel tie-dye would have been more accurate
Not sure if jager bombs can cure tuberculosis, but its a theory im testing as we speak
After he called me a "spirited little girl" I realized that I need to stop sleeping with guys more than ten years older than me.
I don't think he grasps the fact that I would much rather he finish inside me than on my $400 Anthropolgie bedspread
he has a puerto rico area code and says his name is johnny cash. extremely suspect
I'll call you tomorrow. I'm ok and back i love you goodnight.
I stole a bike. Here's a pic
Dude my doctor just legit got down on her knees and loudly begged me to do my pap smear
The fact that you screamed, "Alf is my spirit animal!" is proof enough that we're too old for peyote.
I just met a stripper in the light of day who I ate a candy bikini off her body. This is how my weekend is going.
he passed out in the backyard and we used christmas lights as extension cords for the clippers to shave his head.
I tried to fuck you in my bathroom while my parents were in the next room. I am a clusterfuck of fun.
Randomize
