ohhhh fuckk. chicks a dude.
What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
the real housewives reunion is on...i wanna see if danielle can look any more surprised than the facelift allows
i wanna see dina punch her face back to normal
So thats when I found out ur supposed to put the penut butter on your balls not your dogs balls, feels alot better
Is it really that bad? I heard it was like pooping. I like pooping.
sorry for making everyone realize you look like bruce jenner
i think i left a case of beer in your dryer
Pretty sure he sprained my tongue. This is why you don't hook up with gingers.
Watching elf, eating a tub of ice cream, and coming to terms with the fact that I haven't had sex in 5 months. Happy fucking holidays.
Thats alot of pressure.
Just on your vagina. BTW I'm passing your house.
He got hit with a horseshoe, set on fire, fell out of a tree, and puked all over the side of his car, all before midnight. Everclear.
Just traded a shot of whiskey for a warm PBR on public transit. It's that's sort of night already.
It reeks of weed and poor life decisions in here
I apparently got up in the middle of the night after fucking him and started looking for you under piles of his clothing
How do I stop your cat from bathing me? I'm afraid she'll get drunk off my sweat
Randomize
