It's not a real calculator it's a math calculator
This situation is one cop call away from being a Lifetime movie.
nutella sex= disaster
My facebook horoscope today said I will have a little "confusion". Obviously astrology understands a blackout.
she woke up, said "please dont tell me your name, i dont want to remember it"
After waking up today, I would like to find the Jesus preachers on campus to ask for help in asking for forgiveness to God.
Just saw the hottest 4 garbage men ever. They should make a calendar
We raised our shot glasses and you screamed out "TO MY DAD FINALLY GOING TO REHAB!"
they were fucking between cars in the parking lot and everyone was cheering at them.
Don't mean to be rude. But did you, by any chance, cut down a tree from my neighbors backyard last night? And did you also drag it to my yard and burn it?
I can't tell which way is up. Too many corners around his house too. An arbitary assimilation of edges.
Christ, I swear you are the high man's Dr. Seuss.
I woke up half naked on the floor next to his bed, and his cat was staring at me like it had seen everything that i myself don't remember..
I'm supposed to be at work in 10 min, I just woke up and am 45 min away...tinder for the win
Hey! you should come over!
Who is this? The number is saved as "Sexy Awesome"
dude i haven't had a solid dump since sunday and i still cant hear out of my right ear
Randomize
