This girl is very crazy
She's one of those compassionate ppl
So everything I said on this seemingly endless date offended her
Donna and I are betting on whether or not you are going to cheat on your boyfriend tonight....I said you wouldnt do it.
You might as well just give her the money now.
You kept excitedly announcing to the bar what time it was. Followed by an equally excited "Clock language still makes sense!"
Just kicked a guy in his penis in order to win a dance contest on Bourbon....desperate.
We don't have a ruler. Come downstairs and lay in the snow with a boner so we can see how much snow we've gotten. Put your 8 inches to a less shameful use.
She kept screaming "best case scenario"
This better be legit desert and not your penis alamode
Your panties and toothbrush are in your mailbox. just not ready to be with anyone serious. take care.
Did u see the proverb she left as a comment on my picture?
i wondered why i had so many splinters in my hand, then i went out to my car and remembered id stolen an entire cactus
That's not your dick yours is smaller. Nice try.
Wait why do you have a pic of someone else's dick in your phone?
I mean I'm not saying I have my life together but I did just put nerds in a bottle of champagne and then drank from the bottle
who knew tequila and Christmas cookies would go so well together
I'm trimming my pubes right now and the battery was wearing down. So I chose to only trim one side. I cut the right side down and now I look like pubic two-face. Right all trim and near and left like a caveman.
holy shit the yoga instructor bought his baby pig to class today
Randomize
