It's kind of sad that your greatest accomplishment today is that you stood up and didn't fall down.
He looks like he has a penis
What the fuck
A good one, a good penis
I just want you to know how happy I am that you are circumcised.
We should tie ourselves together anytime there is any type of alcohol involved. It's the safest way. I either end up with freshmen or weird ex bfs. You end up with a large cowboy. This is not good for us
Hurricane my ass. I'm riding a god damn kayak down the flooded highway if it's the last god damn thing I do, god damnit.
I wish you'd make everyone's lives easier and do him already. Then we can get rid of him.
When you get home there will be live fish in the bathtub. I did not put live fish in the bathtub.
I should have been on a postcard. I was sitting in the middle of the forest with a plate full of pot brownies and missing you.
Because I was drunk or stoned for 4 days. I either made terrible decisions or none at all.
He spelled Steven with "ph", needless to say my nose was almost bleeding from the amount of axe he was wearing.
I'm horny too so maybe we will both recap our regrets on Sunday
She took a six hour road trip with me so I could have revenge sex with my ex's brother. That is the definition of a best friend.
She has a bong hits for Jesus shirt. Of course I'm going to like her.
My moms new boyfriend looks like Stu Pickles if he was in a biker gang. He gave me free coke though, so come party?
Legal advice please. Can you sue someone for jerking off to photos of you?
Randomize
