Dude, just walked by a homeless guy pissing on the sidewalk while he was screaming at his wang. God, I love this city.
When I came home you were watching infomercials, eating croutons out of the box and salsa from a funnel. Well done.
I REALLY appreciate you guys taking care of me when im wasted but i think its weird when i wake up in different clothes than black out in
i just had to wipe vomit off my fone to text you. yeah that hungover.
No no no. When you take one for the team, there are no stipulations or conditions
Time to do stuff I know I'll have to hide from my grandkids one day and everyone at next weekends wedding.
You know it's been a while when you're having to resort to positive conditioning to get women
We did it in the bathroom in Taco Bell. We didn't buy anything before we left, which I thought was rude.
Definitely worth waiting her kid to got to sleep when the first thing you hear once she's back is "I want you in my ass right now"
I just watch that 70s show all day and blaze whenever they do. It's nice being part of the circle
We made out a little and then he gave me some weed. I would say it was a pretty productive stop on my way home
we told the drug dealer that our car was dead and we needed a jump so he would bring the drugs to us...
Not my type, but the penis looks fun.
My professor is wearing skinny jeans, orange socks and just said penetration. I don't know what to think
He woke up and decided to go for a swim in the lake... At about 3am... With his dogs
Randomize
