Running into every girl no one would hook up with here at rick's. Typical.
I went for the touchdown every play, and I think I ended up with herpes.
obviously he has no clue about college dating. it goes drunken sex then the 1st date
If those antibiotics mean you can't drink, ya might as well pack your bags and re-enroll next fall, because sobriety this week would be social suicide.
We decided this year instead of not participating in Halloween at all we are going to hand out free beers to the parents.
I threw up in a Buffalo Wild Wings and then got a high-five. I really don't understand America
I'm not sure... But I think I just found a porno I starred in during my black out week of '08.
I woke up in someone's flat in Budapest and then got offered a free piercing before I left. Best. Hookup. Ever.
I accused the cab driver of smoking weed in the taxi then I remember it was me.
Being in nursing school really pays off when your dealer tries to pass off naproxen as Percocet. Like I may have made a C in pharm but I aced the pain drug test
Honestly at least you're not debating on whether or not you need to take plan b. But I can't because I spent all my money on pizza.
He just showed up at my house with a giant box of Trojans and a 6-pack of Yoohoo "for a special treat afterwards". I'm in love.
My ex gave me head because she said she didn't enough when we were dating... Best ex ever? I think yes.
The waitress at the Denny's in usa remembered me from 2 years ago when we went at 4 in the morning plastered, wearing overalls and huge inflatable corona hats on our heads
Im sorry for telling you id rather jump into traffic than date you again. I didnt mean to be so rude
Randomize
