Hallmark should totally make "congratulations on getting your period" cards...I feel they would be quite popular.
there were like 150 questions AFTER the application. you'd think for a store that has dick molding kits it'd be a joke
In reality u ask do u have beer at your house but what your really saying is will there be cock in my mouth
She just flushed the toilet with her head inside it...
Hey since its national brother week is that eiffel tower option with your girlfriend still on the table?
my roommate is sobbing and looking at photos of elephants. i'm so confused.
I need to stop treating my body like that of a Vegas hooker on vacation in Ibiza
You have a roommate and cry when you see my dick
Does Jim keep sending you pics of him in drag too???? If so, are you also slightly uncomfortable?
you 2 were alone in the living room and the dog walked in and you started yelling what are all these people doing in here
He gave me twenty cool ranch tacos and declared, drunk, " Look, I do good"
Getting high in the car with mom and the aunts during intermission for drag queen bingo. Details later.
Rock bottom: having sex rejected while your boyfriend talks in his sleep as you stuff your face with Girl Scout cookies
He’s 21. The president of his frat. I’m 28 and have a career!
Do it. It’s a noble position.
All I can remember from last night was eating nutella and touching myself to Weird Science.
Randomize
