Just woke up naked in my storage cubby and some one rearragned my whole room?
no jk, not my room
my dad is drunk dialing our relatives who are stuck in a blizzard asking them to pick up sun tan lotion for him cause hes too drunk to drive to the store.
I'm so hungover i just sang the alphabet to see if "Z" comes after "W"
So about class tomorrow..... i,ll be there. But I may be still a bit drink and wearing a suit. I'll explain when I get there.
Whatever is fine with me, as long as I am dressed in green and end up shitfaced.
When did you hit me on the head with a stool?
I don't really know how to say this, but I have an oven mitt to return to you tomorrow..
I woke up smelling like chlorine with a broke toe. They know how to fucking party on lake lanier.
I feel like I got ass raped in the brain.
wellllllll.... I literally just puked in my mouth so perhaps this is not the epic love connection I believed it to be 3 minutes ago.
Nothing like a little " am I gonna shit myself " to spice up the work day
He was awful. Hubby's was apparently epic. I suck at swinging.
He left stubble rash on my thighs and cooked me bacon before 9am. I need to lock this down STAT
every day is bullshit and fuck everyone. That's my motto for the week
You "drove" the computer chair around the party for a good fifteen minutes. you would crash into things, freak out, and yell for an ambulance.
so on a scale from morning glass of wine to that time i burnt the garage down how drunk were you last night
About 'lets tie a boat to a truck and ride it down the freeway'
Randomize
