Raging hang over. 6AM finish. Shat on a bag of trash in an alley. D L that last bit.
weddingsv make me drug and hornr
I hate myself for knowing the words to party in the USA.
Then you ran outside and said you were gonna give the snowman a blowjob
Come outside. The vendor wants to go out strong tonight! Russian hooker interviews. Don't ask. We leave in 3 minutes.
On a scale of one to everyone dying I say let's aim for a 7
He tried to use a signal flare to light the bong
And?
He melted the stem
Well I'm currently debating between getting toilet paper or getting my eyebrows waxed so... There's that
Hes wearing a shirt that says warning shitshow and i cant help but think his attorney made him wear it so ppl know the dangers.
Whatever happend to that lawsuit where he got sued for shittig in that fish tank
He asked if I could ever take him seriously, I told him I just like his doggy style.....needless to say I snuck out after an awkward cuddle session... I wont be calling him at 2 am anymore.
I'm working on a search warrant...can u pick up box of Chardonnay...I'll give u cash when u get here...
Yea... I love that ur a prosecutor and drink box wine
he stole a smokey from the street meat vendor and put it in his pocket when she wasn't looking and now we're drinking avocado margaritas
What's life without a pregnancy scare?
Whenever you have to pee or whatever I'll be over here to harass you
Let's just grow old together and be the crazy ladies that sit on the park bench, drinking booze from flasks and loudly talk about people who walk by.
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