Are you missing anything? I found a wedding ring in my bed this morning.....
some dude is getting blown right outside the bar in his car. reeediculous
class
he's dribbling her head like he's fucking allen iverson
he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
I just mistook a monk for someone with the newest colored snuggie.
Yea i traded my bed for half a bag of jimmy johns jalepno chips, am I proud of it no, Am I happy I did it? yes
You were basically naked. Just covered in pink duck tape and feathers. I'd have to say this is beyond the slutty mark..
And I might get them triple pierced after that
Damn, I didn't realize you'd declared war on airport metal detectors
Wait. Did you let me snort wine last night cause I wanted to smell jesus's blood?
Yes. I have pictures. Your soul is mine.
I feel like calling off tonight. Is a strong desire for masturbation a valid reason?
I apologize for tapping your ass. It was a friendly tap. Like Casper. Ya know
I just found (and ate) a chunk of a reese's that fell between my boobs. Problem is that I finished those off 3 days ago in a drunk induced sob session... Has it really been that long since I changed my clothes?!
So you're not opposed to us ever having sex again? Because it just seems like such a waste to let a penis like yours go.
He finished and he wasn't even totally hard. He actually came without a boner.
HOW IS THAT EVEN POSSIBLE.
I did crash a prom last night though.. It was fun
as a self proclaimed hoe im ok with a lotta things but that is not fucking one of them
Randomize
