I think i really like him...he was super cuddly and kept me company.
stop. you already have a dog
You act like I'm friends with her or something. I only screw her boyfriend!
Oh yeah.
I just witnessed someone getting head in the parking garage. Don't ever tell me Baylor is too conservative again.
Dubbing lion king over planet earth. That stoned.
In a cab. Towels everywhere. Confused.
This lumberjack with a huge beard is doing his group presentation in a dirty t shirt that says "I'm only 2 girls short of a threesome"
Obviously you've never slept with someone who was deliverance level inbred.
Why is hotel staff askin about the blood in our room
Who the fuck superglued glowsticks to my arm.
I have managed to reach the 'after meth poster look' before lunch here...
Ryan got so drunk he gave a hobo $20 and I had to zip tie him to the bed so he doesn't out stupid himself
I yelled "NO FLEX ZONE!!!" at the guy that thinks it's cool to take off his shirt at the party then proceeded to puking
Yeah that stuff was rough. We insisted on wearing our bikinis all down college ave, and at several parties that were not beach themed
Mike's letting gay guys do body shots off him again.
My boyfriend, ladies and gentlemen.
You were so drunk Last night you asked for your glasses so you could read the directions on a band aid
Randomize
