Black out sex on the trampoline? yes please.
everytime she opens her mouth i wish that i was deaf
wouldnt it be awesome if walks of shame were like charity walks...you could get sponsors and shit and donate money to curing STDs or cancer
If we don't get kicked out of this hotel tonight for fucking too loud we're breaking up
She went into the basement and sang to my cat for three hours....she actually has a beautiful voice....
Give me a few hours to remember what being sober feels like.
good, we got high then went swimming. shelly forgot to keep swimming so we tied her to the ladder in the shallow part with her bikini top.
I'm lying on the floor in the back room praying my boss doesn't come to work today.never again
Can you fuck me on the kitchen counter at some point? I'll lysol it after
while she was riding me, she looked at me and said "this is why mom told me learning how to ride a horse would be important for my future"
but im not going to tell the owner of the penis of my dreams how to wear his hair.
tried to out drink an american air force weapons loader. never again
Drunken snow shoveling. Visiting my family is starting to become a seriously risky venture.
I don't even know if he's actually hot or just hot because he plays hockey..
You did not just say that.
I smell of tequila and Im going to a funeral. This is my life.
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