I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
What's the politest way to tell someone that you're only interested in them when they're naked, and even then it's just like a passing "meh?"
UPDATE: In a passionate fit of self love, I brought myself to orgasm under the moon on my 7th floor balcony, ejaculating between the rungs towards the ground.
Unfortunately, I did not realize that most of it would end up on the balcony below mine.
At least you don't cum in color.
3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
Actions speak louder than words. Her actions scream crazy.
Some guy said that sham wows were the same as regular shammys. needless to say you had to be restrained. you kept trying to 'slap chop' him.
i think i recognize dicks better than faces
He just used my bikini trimmer to give himself a fumanchu. And I still plan on having sex with him tonight. This has to be what true love feels like.
I think I broke a hole in her wall trying to do backflips
Thought it only fitting this Jubilee weekend to snort lines with a 50 note
Your patriotism amazes me, the Queen would be proud!
Totally uneven. One tiny pussy lip that almost didn't exist and one giant lip that unfurled liked 5 different times half way down her leg and could have been used to hoist the mainsail on a pirate ship.
I feel like I'm laying on a pillow cloud. With little baby angel fingers between me and the cloud lifting me up. Singing hymns in my ear.
You can kiss the security deposit goodbye after you and your boyfriend did donuts on his moped in the middle of the apartment. It was impressive since you were both too drunk to walk.
I think I need a restraining order. I had 15 "selfies" of him on my camera roll......my phone has a lock code on it.
You shouted, "LOOK I'M HAWKEYE," and beaned mike with a dildo from across the room.
Randomize