found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
Yeah I'm pretty sure at one point I was telling her to keep her dick in her pants. She was going to do some serious damage.
They threw a beer at you on stage and then you stopped the karaoke and cussed everyone in the bar out for 2 minutes
just had sex with a midget and didnt wrap it... were totally gonna have a tv show :)
the first call I got in the morning was from visa fraud prevention so yeah it was one of those nights
Idk how she did it. Either she watches freakier porn than I do, or I really need to go get tested.
Had a student tell me he misses the old Four Loko. He's in 7th grade. No one is allowed to claim I started drinking too young ever again.
I have bruises on my ass from her spurs. God bless Texas.
I've done nothing but whore my gay ex bf out for the past 48 hours. It's getting weird.
I am too hungover to address any of this right now, every time i move it feels like i'm being bitch slapped by the hand of God
I don't like him near enough to give up day drinking AND my prostitute costume
all i remember is walking in on u shitting and crying listening to shawty get loose. its safe to say this break up has taken a toll on u
Trimming my pubes at 1 AM, drunk, listening to Stevie Ray Vaughn. What has become of me.
Jesus christ stop updating me about every aspect of your life.
That's a gentle way of saying I passed out like an 18-year-old on his first trip to Tijuana
Ur creepiness is now affecting my life and I'm not okay with it
Randomize
