What happened to our ballroom dancing plans
Fun fact: when I ripped off my wristband, I punched myself in the face. Rad
North Korea, Best Korea!
This concert is like a reunion of all my bad sex.
I just want uncharted vagina. Fresh and ripe.
I would call you but I don't feel like these hands belong to me.
Confession: Sometimes I wear my stolen scrubs to the corner store because people will think I'm a doctor and not just a girl too lazy to change out of her pajamas.
Omg yes! I just found a random muffin! Don't question it. Just praise the miracle.
me + whiskey = a bad person
somehow a ride to walgreens turned into a threesome.
I've come to the conclusion, I should prob have at least 20 hr supervision. I would say 24, but I'm guaranteed to pass out for at least 4 hrs a day
Oh my God it's like my cock was dipped in lava
I had such a bad bruise on my knees from blowing him so much, he asked if he could sign it...
He told me he would make me come so hard I would throw up. I'm actually horrified that he thinks that's something any person would want
Did u find my other sock in your bra? U said u were uneven so I did the gentlemanly thing.
Randomize