Hahaha figures, hmm should I spank you? Or throw a cow at you?
Anyone ask you how much a bj cost yet? That shirt is so whorish
fuck. did you have to draw it on me with a permanent marker
he told me he once ran a blackmarket liquor store out of his house. thats all it took for me to go home with him
Some guy stole lobsters by hiding them in his pants. We should strive to be like him.
trying to line up a DD for St Pats Day. i guarantee i will put out. or puke and pass out. really its 50/50 at this point.
how did my horoscope know i was too hungover to operate a stove.
No we just stood in the kitchen and laughed for 2 hours about how funny the popcorn noise was.
All I remember is passing out with an umbrella over my head and waking up screaming bad luck for seven years
Might I also add after my boss threw up in the garbage can and yelled puking rally, he dougied, then told me I wasn't about that life.
I woke up sick this morning, maybe sucking a random dudes finger at a bar last night wasn't that clean of an idea.....
I was in a competition with shots tonight...shots won.
Dude, you GARGLED with bleu cheese last night!
Family trip though. I generally don't wheel too much ass with the fam in tow. Despite the fact my parents would be pleased if I did.
I'm sorry you're hurting. Would a picture or my erect penis help?
Randomize
