D3 body, D1 cock
I've blown a few things in my day
Just turned rock'em sock'em robots with my little cousin into a drinking game. Im drinking bourbon hes drinking hot chocolate.
i walked outside and you were driving up the stairs to her apartment
he broke off your car antennae to use as a walking stick before he smoked because he claimed to lack the facial strength needed to open his eyes when he's high
This is a pre-sorry for hitting on and then sleeping with you're ex
It's official, I need to start putting my vagina's needs before my own.
He's just giving off this "someone be a bitch to me" vibe
it was her dad's 50th birthday kegger. Within the first 5 minutes I got punched in the ear from an off-duty cop and smoked a joint the size of my vibrator.
oh yeah, and she got boxed-out by said cop. Then her dad turned around and high-fived him for it
Can I come by? I want you to meet my squirrel
I hooked up with a blind guy last night... he's clapping in order to find his way around our apartment
Nothing kills the mood quicker than kneeing him in the face during sex
I just shook glitter of my birth control packet so I’d say it’s safe to say it was a good weekend
you are the only girl i know that would bring a plate of cookies to a hook up. but they were awesome. thanks. next time cupcakes?
I’m really regretting these suede pants.
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