Why is it that every time I type the word "give" my phone spells out HIV?! You know how many people i've told I want to HIV them something!
i feel like i'm a professional at blowjobs i can deep throat an entire spatula
I wonder why dictionaries dont have indexes to help find the words easier.
Roller skating + drunkeness + peeing = mess
swears the blind dude on this train is faking. Every day he stumbles and falls into a different girl's lap and then has to grab her tits to steady himself.
It's like a mixture of two words
"town" and "Im too drunk to spell right now"
just got off the metro to throw up and got back on like it ain't no thang
really making moves this morning i see
She liked to slap me in the face while she was on top. All I can say is that big boobs can excuse a lot.
After it was shut down sean literally made out with four separate girls between the 100 feet to our house. It was a rampage.
Do I lose at life if I cry in a grocery store while buying a pregnancy test?
He's mad at me because I said I wouldn't date him if his dick was smaller. I fail to see the issue
I fell out of the car while it was moving then got puked on then puked and cried about then got back in the car and puked out the window when we started moving again
I pour the whiskey from now on
He's smoked my weed, stolen my cigarettes, and used my campus cash, but I try to initiate sex and NOWWW he's all "As your RA, that's a line I can't cross"
Questions: How did Rachel get home? Why did I find both her ID's in my shoes? And does anyone know if she's alive?
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