I know I'm not learning anything when I can't even spell the name of the class I'm taking
Yeah, I just met her and we got arrested together. I think it was a good bonding experience.
It may be that your sole purpose in life is simply to serve as a warning to others..
BAHHAHHAHHAHAHHA SOME ASS IS BIYING NE DRHBKS. DRUBK
I accidentally lit my hair on fire and we broke the bed. How was your night?
Why did you send me 12 pictures in a row of your expressionless face at 2:30 am?
dude, no lie, I would make out with you in front of them wearing nothing but a rainbow colored speedo
I'm so high. Midnight pancake breakfast in bed
This is a mass text. I will facerape you if you bring me Fierce Melon Gatorade and 4 D batteries.
Btw I'm already known as the drunk roommate. Don't know if that's a success or a failure seeing as it hasn't even been a week since I've been here
Well my normal tinder strategy of "Will I have sex with her when I'm sober" has been paying off
Got 3360 Shoppers points for buying Plan B. I guess this all worked out for the best.
So learned a new trick last night.... Taking body shots from my own tits... Mom would be so proud
And now Google thinks I have a hard hat fetish...maybe I do...
THERE IS WATER LITERALLY DRIPPING OFF OF THE CHANDELIER. I OFFICIALLY HAVE THE WORLD'S WORST RAINFALL SHOWER HEAD.
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