he refuses to go down on me anymore when he's high because he thinks my clit piercing stares at him
Is it bad that Pitbull has taught me more Spanish than high school did?
nothing like a negative hiv test and a bag of condoms to brighten my day.
you kept typing in answers.com, why are the state police calling my house, expecting an answer
Dont judge me. He may have been ugly but he was INCREDIBLE. He's like the Susan Boyle of sex.
Sucks about the cops last night
to be honest when I first looked up I wanted to know who was coming from a costume party..
Don't be alarmed at the girl laying on your bathroom floor.
When u wake up, don't be alarmed by the passed out mariachi band, they're cool. Muchos gracias
I FEEL LIKE I CAN TAKE DOWN A FULLY GROWN MOUNTAIN LION WITH ONLY A POINTY STICK OH MY GOD
You called a girl at 4:30am to tell her "your pussy is my top priority" while simultaneously Urban Spooning late night cafes.
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
Just got home, my brothers stoned and he got a high score on COD.. He just asked me if I wanted to have a celebrational yogurt with him. Wtf?
I just got a hug from a random kid in my class. he said I was a champ at the bar last night..someone help me.
I went to finger her and found a penny. I think ill keep it.
I think the night went to shit after he started sweating and crying about a taco he dropped on the ground 3 years ago. No more blind dates
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