I would do horrible things to your vagina.
Prove it.
in the event that i am dead, my body is laying in the intersection of ... the pearl in springfield. it was my friend's 21st but i think i'm dead. wearing a black top. like i said, probably dead.
Needless to say Beer Gardens severly frowns upon playing flip cups with real glasses.
He had to pee in the sink beside my head because the girl that I was taking care of was passed out on the toilet. To answer your question: yes i took a peek. Thats why we hooked up later.
I'm in new territory... I've never had to convince a guy to let me give him head as an apology.
She's locked herself in the bathroom with a tub of icecream and she's watching my little pony on her phone. We know it cause she sings with them.
Heard in class today that they replaced our carpet in last years apartment because they couldn't get the smell out, dude we smoked way to much pot last year.
I hope we all get so wasted that we ride the cows again
Oh my god I just remembered I bit a stripper last night.
he was very distressed by my statements that there could have been balls on shoulders without awareness
The hot tub didn't work. But it's okay because we discovered just how many people you can fit in a bathtub.
I mean I puked all over three separate towns last night and I still think you're the one who should reevaluate their life.
I’M DRUNK AND EXCITED.
I just realized now that I slept with him while he was still wearing the maid costume... I've reached a new level of sexual freakness.
she wants homewrecking advice
are you gonna teach her your ways?
obvs. i'm like her yoda.
Randomize
