I cant go down on him yet. All ive had to eat is olives and percocet. semen would only add to tomorow mornings discomfort.
I know it's not standard practice to meet the couple you donate to, but i'm curious as to what kind of people saw my picture and said, we want that girl's eggs
I'm pretty sure there was a language barrier but he knew what "harder" meant.
I knew you would eventually ask my secret. Pedialite mix drinks. Works wonders.
How did you even find out?
Because you came up to me and said "I just fucked in the bathroom."
Oh.
Today is National Blunt Day in the Great State of Me. Come ovah
If waking up at 6 50 pm every day and getting invited to go have sex as you wake up is what alcoholism is like I can get use to this.
I slept naked with a towel wrapped around my waist in case I pissed the bed again
Just woke up. Will be over soon. DON'T LEAVE THE CHAMPAGNE UNSUPERVISED.
Which one of you fucks put a bounty out on my brother's virginity?
So, I've discovered that I'm approximately 70% nicer to my mother when I've had an orgasm in the last 48 hours. It's science.
Who the fuck is "nick from the beach last year"
No idea hahaha...why?
He just texted me.. Should I ask where I met him?
I want you to remember that you started masturbating in front of a car full of people. That drunk.
Let the clothes fall where they may.
you drug him to get him horny then deny him sex. freaks.
Randomize
