it doesn't get any better than taco bell and soft core porn
woke up naked, spooning with wine bottle.. and my video chat was still open. fuck, not again.
I have a new fascination with cutting really small segments of hair off peoples heads when they're not looking.
she ate the whole pudding cup using only her tongue. i'm considering going lesbian for her
there's a picture of him beating off in the library with a cowboy hat. please steer clear of this one if you ever want to be respected.
we were bear claw grabbing his crotch in the middle of the bar yelling prominent ridge over and over.
The walk home from the bar is FAR more shameful in daylight.
Slow dancing with the chandelier.
Walk of shame dressed as a Christmas tree, it happened. Ho ho ho bitches
Pants off. Spirits lifted.
I woke up with my panties in the cat food dish, and everything covered in honey and bruises.
I think I'm gonna cut my hair just so I stop waking up with semen in it
My neighbour just came round to ask why we posted a spatula through his door at 3am. What do I tell him??
... and this time i WILL NOT make out with anyone dressed as batman.
Unless you want to see me masturbate, I think skype is a no go for now.
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