Well I thought that next 8 ball would either kill us or turn us into Gods
got in a fight at the bar because some dude thought i was being sarcastic when i told him "sweet mustache". it really was a sweet mustache
What did you even date her?
because emotionally unstable girls are great in bed.
my mom just asked me, concerned, if I swallowed.
IT'S FRIDAY. So quit being a pussy, get out of bed, and come help me drink these 40s. That's not a request.
Maybe I'll make your dreams come true and pee on you tomorrow.
Couldn't finish, so she gave me "the tap," and I had to leave the mound early. Nothing worse than the long walk back after the manager comes out and asks for the ball.
We're keeping you on a leash this Saint Patrick's Day
Yeah the last text says "How many your ass,,,,, prepare it" so take that for what it is
I have 80 very blurry photos of you on a stripper pole...
Like I owe him sex. Hell fucking no. I owe myself sex. With a celebrity. Or a clean pornstar. Who knows.
I just watched a porn called gay of thrones and I think I've reached a new low in my life
STOP FUCKING TELLING PEOPLE ABOUT THAT TIME THAT GUY CAME ON MY FACE WHILE I WAS ASLEEP!!!
That seems dangerous to buy acid from a stranger on craigslist
go for it girl, the world is ur dick oyster
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