thanks...oh and i got my period
told you
oh hush
We were chasing that deer in the quad and next thing I remember I woke up in my RAs bed. I'm probably in trouble.
I was thinking about him in the shower then i get out of the shower and there was a text from him
its like he has a camera inside of my shower that looks into my brain
Just don't lie down.. Throwing up upwards is NOT cute the second time.
Apparently I also called my credit card company to demand a credit limit increase. I'm so content with not drinking another 60 days
I'm really good at handling things like foreskin and speech impediments.
Ugh why does it have to be margarita Monday. Why can't it be pants off dance off beer pong but with jager Monday.
And now thanks to shrooms we all got a terrifying glimpse of what goes on in his head. I will not say I didn't see it coming when it turns out he made a suit out of people's skin
Well the streets were closed, so it was okay for me to just lay down for a little bit.
Today in French class my teacher was singing "what does the fox say" so i started answering in similar satanic ritual noises
I had wine for breakfast at 6am, that's how visiting my parents went.
Drunk you decided to patrol campus as the Arrow and tell random bystanders "YOU HAVE FAILED THIS CAMPUS." Campus P.D. did not join your crusade.
That explains the nerd bow & arrow...
OH GOOD GOD THE BUFFALO WING SAUCE IS BURNING MY FUCKING CUNT. WHY THE FUCK DID I AGREE TO SPICY AND NOT MILD
Just because you got dumped by some loser doeant mean you need Jesus. It just means you need better friends and some booze
honestly, fuck you guys. i'm gonna get drunk by myself
Randomize
