i would totally change schools right now just to be that new girl everyone wants
I walked outside out to find her peeing in her toga with a cigar in one hand and her thong in the other
are you aware you chucked your pizza at a girl's face after the bar last night?
There needs to be a crayon color for how blue my balls are
YOU ARE TAKING ADVANTAGE OF MY INEBRIATED STATE
YOU ARE DRUNK AND USED AND SPELLED THE WORD "INEBRIATED" CORRECTLY. I AM TAKING ADVANTAGE OF NOTHING.
I CAN'T HELP THAT I'M MULTITALENTED YA FUCKER
You're tall, so I have high hopes for your dick.
No I have an idea, I saw you running through the neighborhood at 3am while I searched for my flip flops in a ditch
He sent me a picture of his dick saying "your throne my lady" for my birthday. He knows the way to my heart.
Totally just railed SuperGirl for my birthday. Best Girlfriend EVER!
Some male strippers are here, I threw pancakes at them. It's ok
Ya apperently its not "appropriate" to fuck in the school auditorium
It's only funny because he thinks you had sex with him to rob him.
Fun fact: I came home from the riverboat without my panties. And woke up with a different pair on.
When was the last time you got laid?
When was the last time you came home sober?
touche
Lobby closes at 2 AM on Thursday, but everyone walking still wants food... I could run a "Taco Bell Taxi" when I clock off at 2 and charge a dollar to give drunks a ride through drive thru.
Someones thought of a way to afford tuition.
Randomize
