So he flipped me over and suddenly went limp then told me he was thinking about his ex.
so you punched his junk, right?
I'm going to rape someone's good day.
If she sucks any more cock I swear she will be a spermivore
You'll be the first to get a "it's herpes simplex 1" cigar.
I don't think I can handle being a slut. There is a lot more emotional stress that I never realized.
she has her graduation year in her skype name, it's like a constant reminder that she's jail bait.
Just realized I left my heels in their microwave. Whoops.
I remember trying to cut the power to a house I thought was "too bright to understand the meaning of christmas". Pretty sure I blacked out down the street.
I have no idea. But I feel like I could climb a mountain and then have sex on it.
Anyone who has court these next few days keep your head up & smile knowing we broke the County Record with 27 underage consumptions
Don't do anything I wouldn't do. Thankfully for you that list does not include male models.
When I go to hand him the blunt and he's eating a cookie and responds with "let me hit this cookie"
i don't know what happened one minute im stumbling home drunk and the next im drinking pabst and smoking with a french guy ive never met named hugo.
We need to get walkie talkies for when we're drunk so if we are at different parties or lost we can talk
What a weekend. It started with me realizing i might not be straight and ended with me spraining my foot.
Randomize
