so explain again why im purple
no
She looked kinda like Mario Batali?
she just convinced the cop to buy us ice-cream sandwiches. best/worst stoned experience ever.
she walked out and i tried to get her to come back but i couldn't remember her name so i just whistled... future reference: that doesn't work
You were walking around in your swim suit, an open robe, snow boots and a death grip on that handel of captain morgan.
The last thing I remember is teaching our waffle house waitress to do the stanky leg and promising the grill cook we would come see him at his other job.
Good afternoon everyone! Just texting to inform you that Andrew, your emotionally detached man-whore, will be back starting this weekend. Please RSVP.
my friend thinks you're hot & wants to fuck you ps i'm my friend
my sex drive just dried up, fell out, and is rolling on the floor somewhere.
Should I go bust a nut on the beach
Why does 10AM Spanish always turn into a discussion about my sex life?
i feel like every weekend turns into a giant blur of i dont want to know...
Well I thought I saw everything and then I saw Christmas themed poop bags at Petco.
You did an excessive amount of blow and then screamed "WHO THE FUCK NEEDS A LADDER?!" And then Mario style wall-jumped onto the roof. It was one of the most impressive things I've ever seen.
Lately I've been very attracted to Kevin Jonas because he's like...less hot than Joe, but he's this healthy mix of both Joe and Nick. It looks like he's finally growing into himself.
Randomize
