I just remembered that last night when we tried to walk off the spins you said "pretend i'm your pet dinosaur" so i walked you around on an invisible leash while you made t-rex hissing noises.
xbox live and facebook are tricking me into believing I actually have an active social life
He kept starring at my ass and repeating "Its Just a beautiful piece of artwork."
After 10 years all I have gotten is one bra pic, at this point I should be able to draw your cervix from memory
Either way I should probably pregame on the plane
becoming an adult blows. i don't think its possible for me to wake up for anything that doesn't involve kegs and eggs or half naked bums passed out in our yard.
He started to lose his balance halfway through his "commencement speech" at the top of the staircase. The rest is bloody, profanity-laiden history.
Just now remembered singing Trashy Women at the reception. Not karaoke, just sang along with the mic I stole from the DJ. All while still in my dress drinking champagne from the bottle
my left tit made it into the crop job on your profile pic, I knew it was good for other things
I'm not driving across town for three thrusts and an excuse
My dad picked me up from the bus station and as soon as he saw me he yelled "bus backwards is SUB!" and started laughing, I'm like 800% sure he's stoned. I'm so happy I came home for spring break.
So, no matter what happens today, hold on to this. At least you're not naked under your ex husband's trench coat being stopped by the police who also work with your ex husband. Long story. Actually, not a long story. That's it.
Actually we have similar relationship styles aka no relationship... it could work
Would you like to get a drink then hook up or reverse order I don't really care. Hopefully you can keep this between us.
Jack and I got in a huge fight at 6am. He fell asleep when I was giving him head so I freaked. We were both black out so I made a memo in my phone reminding me
Randomize
