can "i'm close!" be our safe word(s)?
oh geez, wrong person.
new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
You should have seen the look on the cashiers face when I was buying steel reserve with a suit on.
he picked an earring up off the bar floor and tried to give it to girls as a present.
College students should never be allowed to have snow days. Never.
I cried singing "call me maybe" on the way home from the bar. What the fuck
I also love beards. The playoffs are like christmas for my vagina.
MY roomie made me a chinese name- it's supposed to mean 'the girl of a thousand sins.'
I was just laying in bed wondering if there's more important things in life than cheese stuffed pretzels.
I sent him a bunch of texts telling him that his beard wasn't long enough yet so we couldn't fuck and to text me back in a few hours if it had.
Shirtless guy staggering down the sidewalk, puking into a Prada shopping bag. Ahhh, the walk of shame in Boystown.
Is it morally wrong to give today's hookup a Krispy Kreme from yesterday's hookup or is it just fat love?
Help I can't tell if I'm sexually attracted to Bill Nye
Oh.
You came to the right person.
I cannot belive our party caught on fire
I'm seriously scared right now. Woke up next to 3 geese and a lot of feathers ..
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