No, we just ended up walking around in his pool high and singing songs by The Wiggles.
apparently i'm really good at getting wasted, having sex all night, getting multiple hickeys and oversleeping father's day brunch. this is the third year its happened.
I have no idea how to attract men with my personality anymore. He can't see my tits via facebook chat
i lnow ive slrrwsdy teted you this. but goddamn girl on tv is a good song
Yo I found your batman costume.... It was in my pool with a shitload of beer cans
Bang-toberfest begins!!
PS my house is a mess.
pps I have a rash on my face.
I was just doing the math on how much beer we need for the houseboat. in doing so, I came to the conclusion that we need to open a beer distributor business.
Just puked in my hallway. Good start to a great night
I slept through 4/20 and my roommates bought an entire ham that's just sitting in the fridge...
I don't want to sleep with anyone. I just want a burrito
It's a sad night when one of your friend texts you that she's going on a date with someone you know and then invites you to maybe have a drink after
One time she showed me her pierced nipples in our high school locker room and now she has a daughter
If only he'd realize the fondness I have for his genitals.
My brain is like a TV with 10 channels, 9 of them are static and the other one just plays that one Nagito Komaeda edit on loop 24/7
Randomize
