Guess who just hooked up with the cop that fingerprinted her?
Well regardless of where or with who you will be blacking out and i will be pouring shots down ur throat like a baby bird
Dont forget about the tuna sandwich behind your TV
I still can't believe you had sex with someone who willingly went by Peaches.
I finally looked at the pictures from last night thanks for feeding me and pulling my pants up
I'm trying to ve beat feiesnd sent.
I owe a guy a shoe because I threw it over a fence. That is all.
Why do I even exist?
If I don't have tequila in my hand soon, I'm going to have to violate human rights laws
I will gladly accept you into my home with open legs.
he had hair everywhere except his balls
It's a charity event and she's wearing a cocktail dress drinking a 40... I found my future wife
That was the first time ive ever slept with a girl with a q in her name
I can't believe I slept with a girl who has the words shucks in her vocabulary. I'm getting less picky by the day..
I just want a guy who makes lots of money, has a skilled penis and the sex drive of a 22 year on Viagra. Is that too much to ask?
Of course he’s dumb. He’s got a 9 inch dick! There’s not enough blood in his body for a big dick and a big brain. It’s science
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