in retrospect, sexting while high was a mistake - I meant to say "I'll fuck you stupid, baby" but of course I said "I'll fuck your stupid baby"
Not even the dog will look at me anymore.
Thanks for your number, i want to ski with you, do party with you and sleep with you. Lucas.
Omfg amy I'm not kidding you I think a blow job is what landed me in the hospital
So the name of the kid from the sponsor a child comercial popped into my head while I was masturbating this morning. Needless to say I will now be now be donating out of guilt.
The only flat surface we had was a cheez it box so we snorted the blow off of that. Rock bottom really isn't that bad.
He was my first. He knew. He knew right there I was wrapped around his penis.
I hooked up with a blind guy last night... he's clapping in order to find his way around our apartment
he would snap chat his dick as like Harry Potter
I also have bagel bites. I know that's not as big an incentive as the cocksucking but.....
I moved to this city Tuesday and got laid Saturday. Still got it.
Be quiet or buzz aldrin will come beat you up with science
I'm so sorry to hear about your grandmother. Also how many grams are in an eighth?
Okay, but that still doesn't explain all the glitter in my puke.
Drunk sex on a hardwood floor is never ever a good idea. Lesson learned.
Randomize
