have you facebook stalked him yet?
No, I don’t know his last name...
Just google his license plate numb
and i forgot to tell you that my armpit hair is now completely grown back. man i love winter.
she was giving me head and that cheryl crow 'youre favorite mistake' song came on. she looks up and all i could do was nod
I'm not gonna not go for it, she's foreign and pulled a shotglass out of her thong.
I sent him a pic of my tits.. All he said was, "oh your sun burn"
Blonde 1 is sitting on the floor crying and blonde 2 is asleep with her face in the toilet. This isn't what I had in mind when they asked me back
He pocket texted me while I was blowing him in the car...What are the odds?
Considering how often you blow him,high.
She scratched my sunburn during sex. I didn't know whether to cry or cum
This guys mom bought us a 24 pack and drove me and 8 others to a frat house... Hello moms weekend.
Everything sucks i just wanna cry and smoke a bowl and pet my cat and die. All at the same time
walk of shame this morning involved walking through the in-home daycare that she runs while it was full of kids. judgemental little shits. on a plus, got a juice box and a graham cracker for the walk home.
10/10 dentists agree that he is one bangable mother fucker. hint: i am all of these dentists.
I've never been this drunk around this many toddlers
Let's put it this way, there's not many girls I wouldn't let sit on my face
roommates are droppin acid, i really should stop them from staring directly at the light bulb, but their giggles are so enchanting.
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