my new favorite insult= "thundercunt"
it's business casual sex. like no kissing, shake hands after, occasional frequency
We convinced him to snort an altoid. We should not be allowed to drink together
we took shots then she made me eat a dill pickle with cream cheese wrapped in a piece of turkey.
How did I end up in the pool?!
Welcome to ASU
The best part of that night wasn't even the sex, it was listening to her explain to her boyfriend why she was naked in her room while I hid in her closet.
I think he's speaking German to me now
Nevermind, he's just drunk and not texting properly
But the Super Mario beer pong table is more than appropriate.
Is it unethical to trim my bush hair with the scissors from my office?
I'm giving head in a stairwell, I'll be back in a few minutes. I'm so ashamed.
Dude she's from Moscow. I feel like I'm cheating on America.
My mom heard me having sex with my boyfriend but thought it was the neighbors. She commented on how quick it was. I just nodded and changed the subject
Last night i walked into a gas station to get condoms. I threw them on the counter and the guy gave me a funny look because i was wearing a bra under an open cardigan and no shoes. I screamed "DONT JUDGE ME!" and he gave them to me for free.
Planning a vacation around my dog. I have become one of those dog moms.
“On a break” is implied when it’s a Russian chick dressed as Black Widow wearing Minnie Mouse ears
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