Porn is love you can see.
sometimes i really wish you were a nugget.
If you ever get the opportunity, make fun of how small his dick is for me
I ended up on the roof were calling it a tie
thanks for being my moral compass. and thanks for not always pointing north so i can be slutty and not feel bad about it.
There's a point around the one and a half minute mark where the keg stand goes from impressive to pathetic
you are my patron saint of "too drunk for 9am". i just keep asking myself what would alyssa do as i try to regain motor function
My stepdad and I just tag-team hit on a server at McDonald's. This is the man I should have grown up with.
my brain is opting to stay half drunk rather than relearn how to think. the rest of me is in no position to argue.
There's a man with a stuffed dog and a can of dog food on the L. Should I break it to him?
Best not to. Some people need their delusions.
Omg the world wants us to be better people
I refuse
Just for the record, I did not have sex in your bed. Happy 4th of July.
Do you really want to know anything about the inner machinations of a furry's mind
If my vagina was a person it would have a bandage around its head and it's arm in a sling rn
You crawled into bed with Bob and started whispering to him about produce.
Randomize
