I just woke up and i'm wearing a cape and it says sup slut on my ass
i know he has to tuck it when he gets excited in public and all, but now he is just starting to show off.
I looked up to you, until I saw her walk out of your room.
Ordered weed last night from the delivery service, and who showed up...my old real estate broker. He said, "this is less stressful." Duh.
he has a puerto rico area code and says his name is johnny cash. extremely suspect
i lost his rear view mirror, your phone charger, and my lesbian virginity. 21 isn't shaping up too well so far.
Found your pants. They were stuffed in the tank of the toilet.
He came on my face. Threw a towel at me. Stole my weed. And left. I thought this would be over after we graduated?
You kept saying,"there's a seahorse in my stomach, who's trying escape". This was after the curtains attacked you.
All i know if I'm throwing uo into a bag with a smiley facE on it right now and this is not a smileuy face time right nowe
Fair enough. I'm gonna finish off half a bottle of Brunettes in the shower anf relive the good ol' days. We need a reunion
Eye drops are like seatbelts of being high. Think about it
I just wanna be able to fart and do my homework but he won't leave
If I got paid for every bad decision I've made I would be one rich bitch by now
But you''re still having sex with him. And a hobo convinced you to.
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