return my video game
that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
was it mean of me to chase him screaming "DO YOU EVER WANT TO BE ABLE TO HAVE CHILDREN?!"?
i need a lesbian romance or unplanned pregnancy for some spicein my life.
u downloaded tardy 4 the party
then u started screaming about not wanting nene on the record
Correct me if I'm wrong here... but did we serenade each others breasts to "winds of change" last night?
i bought another $5 worth of vodka. with change. i look like a homeless alcoholic. i need your dino cups or else i'll be forced to make a giant jello bowl shot
Im dating a 38 year old who's lap I can fit in. Tell me I don't have daddy issues.
You passed out while holding my hair during a blow job.. i think your gona have to earn back blow jobs
My nipple piercings are like the guardrails, that's why they feel so safe.
It's supposed to be a shit show, it's an end of the world party.
I woke up with a meat pie in my hand and my mouth tasting like an ashtray. I'm a catch, really!
who is that guy in your bed? he looks like jesus..way to keep it festive
Did you really just reference your penis in a pep talk? I think I may love you more now.
I just chased my hot mailman down the street to ask him out and now I am 98% positive he gave me a fake number.
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