No, I don't think Michelle is a squirter. And if I've had anal sex, the Obamas have.
Vodka and Eggs at 9:30AM = thank you, America.
I managed to fit my wallet, my keys, my phone, Tammy's necklace, and $38.50 all in my bra. and $1.50 is in quarters. go me.
All is not lost. The bondage chair came with repair seals and glue. It's like the knewwwwwww this would happen.
you came out with your cock in between the legs of a balloon animal. Maybe she'll think you have a sense of humor.
What kind of balloon animal was it?
I'd say things got weird when I started doing lines of molly in the box.
The family next to you was not pleased
You need to get laid. You spent last night stumbling through the club pulling couples apart and telling them to leave room for Jesus.
Beer, water, beer, water, beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer so much beer
I saw a kitty kat get finger blasted on the couch by a Bulls player
Her tutu was on the floor and she wouldn't take off her crown. She kept saying you're fucking a princess!
In 2014 only three boys have seen my boobs so far
WHITE RUSSIAN BREAKFAST CEREAL.
I spent most of the stoned conversation with my dad proving to him that the Newfoundland is an actual dog and NOT a Snuffaluffagus-esque figment of my stoned imagination, while laughing over the fact there is actually a place caller Dildo, Canada. Have YOU taken time to be a good dad today?
Want to come over and dangle your tits on top of me like a skewer?
Bruh. You offered the cashier tater tots that you had stuffed in your pocket.
Yeah, and? She might've been hungry.
Randomize
