no, he's only a walking dick if he mans up. right about now he's just a walking transgender.
great sex! but now the fight over who sleeps on the wet spot starts.
Just found out that I was singing john legend songs as I threw up last night. Quality.
Ever since they found the bud they've been sending me visa gift cards instead of cash. Bastards.
We had sex in the ocean but the tide took our clothes away too. Its no fun walking back to the dorm wearing only a beach blanket between you.
I woke up to her vacumming the grass
I have just two goals for this NYE. 1) get so drunk that every guy looks like Clive Owen 2) make out with as many Clive's as possible.
I may or may not have just ruined a marriage. But in my defense I got all my drinks for free tonight.
Put it this way, at one point I was getting stoned on the roof of the strip club with one of the strippers while another one gave me a free lap dance. That wasn't even the best part of the night.
Yes. That was the exact moment of my conscience clicking into instant high alert.
What if there is no right person? Maybe it's just the right cat. Or the right 12 cats.
We fired a shoe out of a medieval cannon. I know not where we got either one.
dude, shes trippin so bad. idk what shes on, she just told me she doesnt remember her name then proceeded to get in the shower clothed to try to "rinse off the high"
I'm assuming you were here at some stage because I woke up alone, clean and in a towel with mum asking my why my shoes, dress and jewellery were in the bottom of the shower.
I wish there were more things in this world as wonderful as string cheese
Surriously
Randomize
