around noonish you got carried out for spitting water and throwing cups at old people...
i deep throated a ruler to see what my limit was...
blow job with a beer in the shower, I just created the ultimate day spa for dudes
my hot student got the clitoris wrong on the lab practical...so it kinda makes me not want to pursue it
just because he can't find it on a cat, doesn't mean he can't find it on you
She fell onto my light and broke all four plants. I don't care how good the blowjob was.
Two girls are doing the worm relatively well on the bar floor after the fact I just saw one puke in the trash
I drank mimosas and played bocce ball in the middle of finals week...now i know how Comm majors feel all the time.
Were not alcoholics, were just impatient for fridays
Way to high for badminton right now. This is gonna be a shitshow.
Would a ten year old streaker be inappropriate?
That's the stuff legends are made of
At least I look tastefully trashed. My nipples are hidden and I'm standing up.
Got home and told boyfriend what happened. He was like "you made out with a guy you call Balls Deep?" and hi-fived me.
I don't know man. I fell outside Pizza Hut and an employee had to perform first aid. But I think I got free pizza. So it was worth it.
Well Jon got a DUI sleeping in the back seat so I thought the trunk was safer. BUT WHO CARES WHY JUSE PLEASE COME LET ME OUT!
Yeah that was post sex. I was thinking in my mind, no wonder he didnt ask me to call him daddy since he actually is a dad
Randomize
