fighting downstairs. join me tonight to hear their makeup sex. also, let's make skittles vodka.
If you really hate me that much, you need to stop letting me put my penis inside of you. It sends the wrong message.
I never said you were fat, just too fat for ME
I took chris brown's side in the conversation ... cut to me not getting laid tonight
Ate pizza for the 3rd time today, can't decide if that's disgusting or an amazing aspect of American culture.
we convinced you the moon was a planet...again
still haven't packed clothes. only wine. gotta love spring break
She told me she cured her bulemia by popping hydrocodone after she ate. that way she would be rewarded for not puking. I like the way she thinks
just customized my debit card w a pic of me ralphing over the toilet. figure it'll give the bar keep a good cut off est and for shits n giggles when buying my handles at the liqour store
Vodka is such a love hate relationship.
Truer words have never been spoken.
I just got hard thinking about a crunch wrap. Im done
My mom just told me my dad shaves his pubes while drunk and I don't know how to feel anymore.
I'm not entirely sure how getting 'house drunk' turned into us getting trashed, being serenaded by karaoke and going out. But it needs to happen again.
I wish I just waited long enough to hate someone to fuck one
Congratulations! We have a period
Randomize
