Random question, how's your gag reflex these days
Omg. There's def a kid, like 10 years old, sitting in a buggy at wal mart holding a sign that reads "I can't behave"
he also begged me to fake an orgasm when he couldn't get me to come.
seriously though jaeger and i are fucking done professionally
i get drunk faster, i spend less money on food, and i'm losing a shit ton of weight. depression and its pills are doing wonders for me
Seriously, she had fingers that made me thank a god I don't even believe in that I'm gay.
When you are 21 it's acceptable to run out of the tavern and puke all over the bike rack... when you are 35 it's called alcoholism.
I just took a service station dump so foul I had to buy gas out of guilt
My tinder date wouldn't stop talking about the Star Wars movie trailer long enough to fuck me. HOW IS THIS MY LIFE?!?
I also have bagel bites. I know that's not as big an incentive as the cocksucking but.....
Happy Father's Day to the first man I called Daddy while cumming.
I accidentally brought up how there used to be a big tree in his yard, which I could only have known if I had been Google mapping his house.
You better not fucking die before we have sex while you blow fire. I'm serious. Don't mess up my sexual bucket list.
It's a classy one I promise! Their toilets are cushioned an tier wifi is named hummingbird
100000% expect a picture of my ass in them
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