READY
for what?
TO HAVE SEXXXX
i think you have the wrong number
batman tramp stamp. Dibs.
his semen tasted like maple syrup. no wonder fat girls always wanna fuck him.
i dodnt think we hooked up bcause he actually texted me the next day
She came over and gave me a handy and then just lingered for a day and a half. Worst weekend ever.
I feel like someone kicked me repeatedly in the ribs. I don't think sex is supposed to do that.
You're asking your pregnant booty call to go to a funeral with you?
I'm running on 2 hours of sleep. Just spent 6 minutes staring at the back of my hand thinking: "I don't really know this that well"
I've made out with more people in 2014 than I did the whole fall semester
Idk how much vodka is on these pants but I'm gonna wear them anyway: the biopic
The bar tender had his entire hand down your asscrack.
I forgot about that. I was in MULTIPLE dimensions.
I thought I'd never say this, but if I had to choose between these cookies and sex, it would be these cookies
You got your ass kicked outside KFC on Tuesday
Dude I love you. So much. Thank u. I'm safea. In allysi lns car. Mine towed. If u loved me ud leand me 500 in the morning. Sleep on it nd let me know.
I gotta do like a month's worth of catch-up personal hygiene today in prep for Christmas so extended family doesn't ask if I'm depressed.
Randomize
