is it bad that i shorted Freddie Mac immediatly after I heard about the CFO?
Ask me how many people I've slept with. Because its changed since I last saw you.
I saw you 20 MINUTES AGO. You need to stop this.
they're like a gay fantastic four
Between the plague n the counterfeit drugs we brought back from mexico I'm not thinking too highly of their country right now. Screw mexican homeless men.
Heed the warning of the ghost of Oktoberfest present: German beer is soooooooo much better than our watered down children's piss. also lost all my clothes and am wearing lederhosen the rest of the trip.
U took a sewing needle to his nipple
Psshh,
I guess I realized I had a problem when I ordered 4 shots and told the bar wench to pour them all into 1 glass
I made a Russian puke. I outdrank a Russian. I am unstoppable.
You need Xanax blowdarts
he doesn't sweat normal. maybe that's what THC smells like coming through the sweat glands...
And then she said "wanna make a vine of me twerking on the wall?"
It can't be easy when an alcoholic Russian is screaming to the entire dorm "he no get hard"
just got a call from a life insurance sellsperson and apparently our xany dealer referenced us. not cool thats breaking the 4th wall
Can you have a quarter life crisis another time? I'm trying to masterbate.
You're the air beneath my wings and the lookout when I pee
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