my night went downhill once I lost my bikershorts. EAWSSSSYY ACCESS
Every good night starts with white castle burgers and shots in the parking lot.
I smoked weed with pregnant girl. I'm going to hell.
Theres was an instant understanding between us being drunk on the trampoline at four in the morning and the people walking down the road at the same time
So would it be tacky to offer my services as a future attorney as an engagement gift for her?
Lesson learned. Kayak oars are not golf clubs....check
My tub is filled with twinkies which would be awesome if they were still wrapped and not floating in a mixture of bath water and what appears to be vomit.
She's on her period. You don't know what fear is.
This snow needs to melt so I can get wasted on someones front lawn
i keep replaying things i did last night. and remembering new things. and its a constant cycle of torture
Hey, taking organic chemistry means no one is allowed to tell you you're partying too hard.
He can kiss the multicultural 3 some goodbye
I don’t know if I’m nauseous or just disgusted with myself.
If I'm not naked in the back of a cop car having sex by the end of the night, I did something wrong..
I thought he was hot. You know, in a “I’ve gone batshit insane and want blood for the blood god” sort of way.
Randomize
