I want 2 things right now, you or a cig
cig
I feel like tequila is Gods way of lighting my fuse to do something awesome
even in my darkest moments, having another person eat my jizz would make me smile
My flask crushed my baggie full of aderall in my backpack, why can't my demons just live together in peace
Hands down, the girl passed out in the bathroom was the best looking. Concious or not.
Was that picture taken before or after I supposedly punched him in the face?
I almost stepped in a homeless mans stream of urine as he was peeing. I love this city.
I came in and she was laying on the ground just stoking it saying "the floor is where our feet step"
Drunk enough that you donated $50 to taco bell, because they serve a great purpose.
I mean, "boo" isn't the appropriate response to someone dying...
You only have to pretend to care about soccer until July. HE'S PRETTY DONT RUIN THIS.
My nerves will need dicks later so.. I'll call you
Well, my mom found the ball gag and whip. Looks like I'm never going home again.
My lease is up and I've been thinking, it's only fair that the guys I've fucked in this apartment in the past year help me move. They enjoyed the bed, now help me move it.
Do u believe in the possibility of big foot?
You high??
Randomize
