Last night he was fingering me with one hand to his ear, calling himself 'dj clittles'
Thats what happens when go home with guys that wear shutter shades to the bar..
Its sad we have to plan out fun a month in advance. 30 sucks.
Can you really blame Steve Phillips? He went to Michigan. Plowing fat girls is a 100-level course there.
Party at my house. Liquor pinata. Your presence is required.
Just put a picture of dead dolphins on her wall...told her the oil spill was her fault.
Umm I need a rain check. Long story short is I have scabies. Research it if you want. I'll tell you everything another time soon, I promise.
I just drank til 6am then boned a 32 yr old that looks exactly like ET. Oh god.
Then he kept saying sentences and ending them all with "the point of no return" even if it didn't make sense, and kept telling this other guy he wouldn't be his "wife son"
I woke up with the suicide hotline number saved as 'Hot Guy Josh'
Hello. You don't know me, but word on the street is that we are now eskimo sisters. I feel like we should go out for coffee and compare experiences.
In case you're wondering what I'm doing, I'll be banging an 18 year old this weekend. Repeatedly.
does having sex with an episode of House playing in the background count as studying for my MCAT?
I'm just now realizing I've slept with guys from three different decades over the past year. That's gotta be some sort of record.
He has a syndrome called asshole. And it flares up 24/7.
Divorce can be hard, but look on the bright side. Your soon to be ex raved about your dick and I’m great with hard things ;-)
Randomize
