overheard a conversation between 2 lesbians: 'back when I used to have dick sex...' oh, vegas, I so heart you
I wonder if those guys know that i know that is a halfway house and dont just think it is some cool older guy frat house.
She threw up everywhere and is crying about a fictional character who died on Grey's Anatomy
Whatever is fine with me, as long as I am dressed in green and end up shitfaced.
You know you're a nerd when you lose track of how many times you've gotten turned on watching Glee.
On the bright side I got 500 American Express points paying for the abortion
Is it mean that I just sent him a pic of my tits with the header, "say bye bye?"
Did we fight the bathroom girl ? She just wanted to give us lotion and condoms.
He's either jacking off or listening to Kanye West.
once again, we need to groom him to be a better human being. using liquor and tits.
If you were awake I would probably ride my bike over, fuck you like a god, leave you in the wonders of life, and bike home
So apparently we wrote "Lube Shopping" in Paula's diary on every friday for the rest on the year....
Holy fucking shit the worst thing for a hangover ever--A FUCKING BOLLYWOOD MOVIE BLARING IN CLASS
I love you. We're gonna celebrate your 21st by putting people in duct tape bikinis and pushing them down tequila slip and slides
He must've been a bear in a previous life. My nipple is bleeding. Shit's sensitive.
Randomize
