Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
I woke up this AM and all of my clothes i wore last night are gone. Instead i am dressed in air jordans, boxers, cargo shorts, and an Affliction t-shirt. the part that upsets me most is that i was with a guy who wears Affliction t-shirts.
Okay Im going to go have some sex apparently. I hope this chick is prepared the zero effort Im going to put into it.
Check Facebook. Random dude tagged us in photos from last night dancing at Denny's while eating a sampler platter. 1. How does he have our names, and 2. You said we ate at Tbell.
Did we literally take a cab across the street
We tried. It's impossible to cum while bouncing on a trampoline. It's like trying to sneeze while keeping your eyes open.
I woke up to a hotel manager knocking on my car ( window was down) and asking if I was ok
My last google search of the night was "Things that cost $102.50"
i think when the guy sitting in the corner singing tells you you're too drunk, you're too drunk.
You tried tipping the cashier at Cook Out by shoving a dollar bill down his shirt and yelling "Magic Mike"
Oh my god. You have got to get off that breast feeding support group. They're on to you, dude.
It feels like I'm being stabbed in the uterus with a rake. That night was totally worth it though. Thanks.
I work nights. I sleep in. I take online classes. And fuck bad bitches. I'd say those are some perks to grad school.
He asked me for a pic so I sent him a pic of my boyfriends dick.
why do i have a pole dance champion shot glass?
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