He has such a weird drunk-voice.
dude, he's deaf.
I wish they had a home preganacy test, but for STDs
what if cement was really a rainbow color they just secretly paint it grey so as not to distract drivers
are you high?
About to find out how well alcohol and lazer tag mix.
Let's get back to talking about you giving me a blow job.
she said they gang banged her to "who let the dogs out." the dude left of the middle barked along. sounds like a good time.
i'm sure god appreciates how great my boobs look during this fine christmas eve mass
I may be new to bar life, but full on grabbing my vag shouldn't happen...anywhere.
Are we still banned from the library?
You don't understand. This could be the last time I shave a star into my vag. Get over here.
I know the wedding is going to be a good time, I don't have to wear a bra with my dress
Apparently I blamed my BAC on the Saint Louis Cardinals...how is that not a valid excuse?!
DUDE. HOLY FUCK MY PRINCIPAL WAS JUST MY UBER DRIVER. I AM LITERALLY TRAUMATIZED. ANS DRUNK. HOLY FUCK OMG
He lives 20 minutes away driving distance and decided to walk. I talked to him today and he took a nap along the way... In a cemetery.
We were literally making dick jokes with his dick out
That’s the level of friends with benefits I aspire to achieve
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